How to talk to guys: a guide to (not) failing at being awkward

1. Don’t make jokes if you are a terrible joke-teller. This also goes for the guys. If you get a “…?” response, don’t make another joke.

2. Don’t reference movies, music, or quotes over 25 years old – unless you know they’ll get what you’re trying to say. Just don’t do it. This also goes for the guys.

3. Talk about your future! Future schooling, future jobs, future destinations… etc.

4. Be serious. Unless they’re joking around. If I want a straight answer, I want a straight answer.

5. Ask questions. Nothing is more awkward than saying “oh yeah I want to be an accountant when I grow up” and having them not respond because you didn’t ask “what about you?” or because, really, what can you say to that?

6. Talk about exotic places. And what you would do if you live there. I don’t know about you, but if I lived in London and had unlimited cash (because my cohort in crime hunted down a leprechaun [to have as a pet] in Ireland and took money from it – uh, haven’t had this conversation before, nope…), I would definitely buy a truck-load of Maltesers and Toblerone.

7. Pretend like you’re talking with a friend. It’s much easier to talk about random stuff (like making London guards laugh and re-naming Jamaica “JAMaica”) than to freak out about saying the wrong thing or not.

Until next time, Em 🙂

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That wasn’t too bad…

This weekend (Fri-Sun), I went to a church retreat for my whole denomination, and omg it was actually really fun.

I mean, yeah, I accidentally went to the wrong cabin, so I was with 7th and 8th graders, but whatever.

And yeah, one of my cabin-mates slow danced with my brother and rated him as 8/10… yup.

Forever alone, since for the slow song, I just sat on the sidelines with this guy I wanted to ask but didn’t… sigh. And of course we were the only people our age/in our group not slow dancing… but whatever. We can be forever alone, together.

But hey, I met some super cool people and I’m hopefully getting together with them soon. Woohoo!

Until next time, Em 🙂

Why are my teachers so out of sync?!

Literally this Thursday, this is what I have due:

1. Spanish test! Yay! We all know I love those!

2. A vocab test! Four pages of fun!

3. Memorizing a speech from Shakespeare that I don’t give a flip about!

4. A history essay on American Intervention in Other Countries! Woohoo!

Apparently we have a test calendar at my school so that this doesn’t happen, but apparently these are the three teachers that don’t use it.

Until next time, Em 🙂

I just feel like punching some people in the face. With a shovel.

I had my band concert today (yay!) and aside from procrastinating on my homework and freaking out about the fact that it’s 11.00 right now, not 10.00 because of Daylight Savings Time (Sigh. Why can’t we just have the “fall back” part and skip the “spring forward” part?! Oh wait, my mother just informed me that it’s next week. Phew), I encountered some very annoying situations.

Anyways… here is why I feel like punching someone right now:

1. My conductor told us our call time was 5.15, when it should’ve been 6.15. Yay.

2. I was hanging out with my friend during this two hour long par-tay before our concert, and we were admiring the spiffy band shoes that the people had at the high school where our concert was held. And then one of the moms that was chaperoning/helping out came over to us and told us to stop touching the shoes… seriously, we were just looking at what sizes peoples’s shoes were. The sizes were written on slips of tape on the cabinet. Not on the shoes. GO AWAY.

2. After being given a lecture, we decided to look at the music they had. Those little pieces of paper are so cool. It’s minuscule font, because apparently the marching band has plastic holders for their music close to their faces (how do they know where they’re going?!). Anyways, we were looking at all the cool songs they play, when the same mom said “you guys aren’t messing up their music, are you?” Uh, no. We were looking at the music that they were playing. We touched max 5 pieces of paper and did NOT take them off the shelf. akdjfdlk go away.

Ahh, okay, the music isn’t attached to their hats or anything… that’s what I thought…

3. Then I was showing my friends my car keys (I drove by myself, yay!) when THE SAME MOM asked me “whose keys are those?” like I had stolen somebody’s keys out of their bag. WHAT. THE. FUDGE. Aughhhh seriously?!

4. When I was driving home in the pitch black, this super slow car was in front of me. They were going max 40mph on a 45mph road, which was annoying. But that’s not the worst part. We came up to a bend in the road where a stop light was. There was even one of those little lights that shows you if it’s a green light or not before you turn the corner so you don’t run a red light or anything. I don’t know what this car was doing, but it LITERALLY stopped. In the middle of the road. On a 45mph road. What. The. Fudge. Everything in my car flew forward, and I seriously felt like flipping them off right then and there. Luckily the road split into two lanes and I got into the other lane, but *magically* the car sped up when I got into the other lane. So much for pulling up next to them and flipping them off.

Until next time, Em 🙂